Creating sexual tension in a conversation or interaction with a woman is an important skillset you can add to your arsenal of techniques you to help a woman feel attraction for you.
There are a number of ways you create this kind of tension, but the basis for it is creating a big “give and take”, where you “give” the woman something, and then you “take it back”.
This may sound pretty confusing, but allow me to explain some of the science behind creating sexual tension.
I’m very interested in marketing and advertising, and a great thinker in marketing advertising is a guy named Roy Williams, who wrote a series of books called “The Wizard of Ads”. Because of this, I went to a program that he had a few years back and he was talking about this area of the brain called Broca’s region.
This was just fascinating to me and I saw how it worked in advertising instantly. But the application was also immediately evident to me for dating success, too.
So Broca plans what we’re going to say and how we’re going to say it and also processes incoming language and communication.
Broca’s area is an area in the frontal lobe of the dominant hemisphere in a your brain, which for the majority of people is the left side. The functions of this specific region are linked to speech production. Broca’s region will actually try to predict what is about to be said – think of a time when you you may have heard a song you hadn’t heard before, but you “knew” the lyrics, because you just knew what was going to come next. This is attributed to Broca’s region.
That’s what this area of the brain does.
Broca is constantly predicting what’s about to be communicated and because of this, if it’s predictable – it’s discounted.
You might want to make a note there – if what you say is predictable, it’s discounted.
A man can’t get noticed – can’t get into her mind – by acting predictable.
You can’t bore a woman into liking you.
If you stir emotions … if you get that emotional brain, the “reptilian” brain, you’ll get attention and be remembered.
If you do not get her attention, the communication will carry no weight with her. Being noticed is KEY to creating sexual tension.
This relates to creating sexual tension in a major way – if you can’t stand out in her mind with what you are saying, if she intuitively “knows” what you are going to say, she’ll find it uninteresting and boring. Then, you are finished.
What you want to do, especially with story telling and other creative communication, is use details and settings that she can’t predict.
If you are telling a story about a vacation you took, for instance, get gritty with the details and scenery. Tell her about how the sand felt under your toes, how the water looked crashing on the shore, the way the mountains were silhouetted against the sky like “ancient granite titans cloaked in ephemeral gray clouds”. Use your creativity, vocabulary, intelligence and wit to make the story as interesting as possible.
Write your stories down, and review them and ADD DETAILS.
If you want to really NAIL this, study some poetry.
Read this exerpt from a hugely popular poem by Matthew Arnold titled, “Dover Beach”…
“The sea is calm tonight.
The tide is full, the moon lies fair
Upon the straits; on the French coast the light
Gleams and is gone; the cliffs of England stand,
Glimmering and vast, out in the tranquil bay.
Come to the window, sweet is the night-air!
Only, from the long line of spray
Where the sea meets the moon-blanched land,
Listen! you hear the grating roar
Of pebbles which the waves draw back, and fling,
At their return, up the high strand,
Begin, and cease, and then again begin,
With tremulous cadence slow, and bring
The eternal note of sadness in.”
When you read this, notice the detailed descriptions, the words he uses to really paint the picture. Use language like this when you are telling stories or engaged in conversation with a woman you are attracted to to create sexual tension.
And in cases like this when you use stories to do this, the “take back” part is when you end the story. If your story is good and interesting, she will be leaning in, at least mentally, listening, eager for more. When your story is done, she is left with wanting more, and sexual tension is created.